Vacation

This freedom make me happy and yet I can't hold still,

I wish I could relax with these days I have,

I wish I could stare at nothing and think about nothing.

What's a vacation if you don't vacate your mind?

The next time I call a week off of work for no reason I'm going to get in my car and drive until I have to turn around. Who wants to go with me?

Questions

Why do you insist on badmouthing each other when we are all a part of the same thing, trying to make it to the same place, trying to serve under that exact same God? Why do you put each other down and try and put each other out of work when the work you are a part of is the work of god? Why do you discriminate? Why are you quick to judge? Why you completely ignore what the other side is trying to say when what they may have to say could possibly be right? What gives you the right to decide whether or not what someone else is saying is wrong? When will you understand that God's plan wasn't for you to bicker and disagree, but for you to love each other just as Jesus loves you? When will you learn that life isn't about building yourself up? Quit worrying about whether or not somebody else's theology is the same as yours. God said to love Him with all of your heart, soul, strength and mind, and to love your neighbor as yourself. Are you truly doing that if your turning your congregation against someone else who is trying to bring people to the kingdom of God? You're bugging me.

Life Challenge

This life can mean nothing, it's cold, it's dark.

It takes more then a man to make it through,

and I am willing to stand up and be that man.

How short of a time we get here,

how big of a change we can make,

how strong of a life we can lead,

how hard of a road we can take.

Take the road less traveled,

and find a greater reward at the end.

This rush of cold air, swiftly flowing through me,

has brought the cold back into the light.

I'm a waste, ashamed of who I am today,

tossing and turning have become routine.

I need to be changed inside,

I long to be the man I'm called to be,

Don't hold my weaknesses against me,

Don't hold me back from the things I love.

What have I done to deserve your glory,

what have I done to receive this grace?

Then I cry out to the Lord most high,

Save me, oh God, make my heart pure!

Then I cry out to the God I love,

Heal this life, oh Lord, restore my soul once more!

Then I cry out to the Savior above,

Shine your light, oh God, I will not ignore

your presence your redeeming grace.

Shine your light, oh God, I will not ignore.

Your forgiveness overwhelms me,

I don't deserve this mercy,

but your love is strong like a mothers love.

There is hope in God.

Tired and Sick

Fed up with mess,

who should feel free,

but I, trapped, can't be?

Lightning strikes,

the ground breaks,

my feet still stand.

This redundancy,

how much can one take?

If I were put here,

and their ears could hear,

would they take it in?

Pray for those,

who persecute me?

When can this torment stop?

When will I be heard?

Let your love come down,

treat me your glory.

Tired and sick of it all,

this place is closing in,

I can feel my brittle bones breaking.

Stay strong, and have faith,

it will be worth it in the end.

I Am Weapon

I am not afraid, to be called Your son.

This is the one chance I get,

to make You proud, to stand for You,

to live my life according to Your will.

My passion is to love those who love You,

and to love those who don't know You,

and love the ones who hate You.

I will not sit by and watch as my brothers and sisters

fall because someone won't tell them the truth.

This mouth will proclaim your words.

My hands are tools for You.

My life is a weapon against death.

This is a call to those who believe,

believe that their life is not theirs,

and should be used for the glory of God.

You're the voice of this generation,

and His words will be spoken through you.

Awaken My Heart

This jealous rage, the anger built up inside,

strung around thoughts that are drowning me.

Feeling the reason to think like I do,

is pressing my mind into a cage,

and is trapping the life I once had.

This gnashing of the teeth,

false miracles fooling me again.

Is this reality, or am I dreaming,

are you trying to wake me up?

The gold that I had, has gained in its value,

and my desire to keep it is strong.

There is no letting go of what makes me alive,

the strength you have shown, is the love that provides.

I'm sorry I'm weak, this weight I can't hold,

with you in my arms, this life will unfold.

I'm a mess at heart, but I'm full of your love,

you're consuming my spirit, Oh Father above.

What power I have, from the heavenly king,

to spread what is good, and to shout what I sing.

The praises I give, are so weak and so small,

with me in your arms, I'm sure I won't fall.

A War Within

Framed from within to be a person I'm not,

slit at the throat, I'm choking on my blood.

This race between my heart and mind

has carved a hole in my life and still seeks revenge.

Desperate to win my mind goes wild,

but the strength in my heart has grown,

and It's no longer afraid to stand up and fight.

This is a war, a war that's been won,

a fight to the finish, I'll no longer run.

Eyes Wide Open

Never stand on the past, it's faults are temping.

Keep your mind strong and your heart open,

to the things that are pulling you forward.

The chances are there for the taking,

grab the hand thats being held out for you.

It's easier then you may think,

don't dwell on the mistakes you've already made,

but prevent the ones that may happen from happening.

Ignorence

I will forever be sickened by the one's who insist on translating the game into a war that's no greater then themselves. They can sit back and watch as the world turns to dust, but I will stand above the fire and be recognized as the man who became fearless in the storm. This hate that surrounds me will pass through one ear and go out the other, I will not listen to lies. I'm being changed by the heart that is within me. This is a new soul to keep.

Waking and Breathing

There was a point where I felt asleep and I couldn't remember how to breathe. I kind of had this feeling that I knew I was sleeping but I couldn't quite wake myself up to breathe. It scared me, it felt like I wasn't in control of my own body, as if there was some sort of outside force telling me what I could and couldn't do. I struggled for a while, shaking, yelling at myself, "WAKE UP, YOU KNOW HOW TO BREATHE." I shook around and tried my hardest to get my mouth to open and suck in the one bite of air that could fill my empty lungs. My mind was screaming, but not loud enough to wake me up. Just as I thought I was going to suffocate myself in my sleep, I woke, and my chest began to rise. I felt relieved, awake, and in a sense, new. This feeling will continue to rise as I live my new life. I will continue to breathe the angry fool wind.